Counseling for Parents of Gender Diverse Teens

“My da- um… child, recently came out to me as transmasc.”

Melissa* said on a first phone call with us. “I googled it but I’d never heard that word before. I love her, oh, um… them so much and want to support… them but I have no idea where to even start.” 

We get calls like this all the time.

Melissa was plunged into a new world with no warning. There was a new name, new pronouns, and new clothes. She had a very insistent teenager who wanted to change everything, and they wanted it changed now. 

“…They said they want to go on ‘blockers’ and want a ‘binder’. I was confused because they already have a binder for their schoolwork, and how does a three ring binder have anything to do with ‘presenting more masc’? But… they looked at me like I’d grown another head and stomped off in a huff and I don’t even understand why.”

Supporting a gender diverse teen can feel like you’re walking in a minefield. 

Even if you use the right pronoun nine times out of ten, the one, honest slip-up earns you the cold shoulder for an unknown length of time. 

Most teens have been exploring and discovering their gender identity for months or years before they tell their parents. They’ve had time to process it emotionally, look into logistics, make plans for their future, and overall get comfortable with the whole concept.

For the parents it is brand new.

We tell parents like Melissa that it is normal to have a lot of feelings come up when a teen comes out. Worry for how the world may treat them. Misgivings about pursuing medical care. Overwhelm from all the new information. Grief for the life you envisioned for your child. Sadness that things are going to be different now.

Your feelings are valid.

You can love and support your child while still feeling and processing your emotions. We’re here to support you, your child, and your family through this process.  

We provide counseling for parents processing their child’s gender diversity, counseling for the teens who are gender diverse, and family therapy for everyone together. 

All big changes come with stress, even the great ones. 

Starting a new job, getting married, having a child, or moving to your dream home are wonderful changes but they’re still stressful! Having somewhere to talk it out, learn about the world of gender diversity from a professional, and get local resources makes this process so much easier.  

Get the support you need. 

Give us a call (714) 584-9018] or book a free consultation with affirming counselors Kylie or Mark.

*Fictional character based on real people we have worked with.